Surrender. especially in American culture, is rarely seen as something positive. It’s seen as giving up or losing. But as a Christian, what does it mean to surrender to God?
Maybe you’ve sung the song in church, “I Surrender All.” The words in the song say “all to thee I freely give.” It doesn’t sound like surrender from loss or coercion. However our best references as people of faith are not songs, but scripture. So let’s dig in to see what the Bible has to say about surrender.
What it Means to Surrender to God
Looking at what it means to surrender to God in scripture, you may be surprised by what’s actually in (or not in) the Bible about surrender.
Biblical Definition Of Surrender
Surrender means accepting that the battle has been won not on your terms, and you are willingly giving your life over to the authority of the winning side. It means taking a humble position and embracing what is over how you would have it.
So here’s the thing about this surrender we sing about, it’s not literally in the Bible. Across multiple translations surrender is only used under 20 times and in every case it refers to literal surrender. Here are a few examples from the NIV.
“They said to the Ammonites, ‘Tomorrow we will surrender to you, and you can do to us whatever you like.’” (I Samuel 11:10).
“If anyone does attack you, it will not be my doing; whoever attacks you will surrender to you” Isaiah 54:15.
And the only New Testament verse:
“He released the man who had been thrown into prison for insurrection and murder, the one they asked for, and surrendered Jesus to their will.” Luke 23:25.
If it’s not talked about so much in scripture, should surrender be a part of our walk of faith? Yes, I believe so. Read on to find out why.
Surrender In The Bible
The discipline of spiritual surrender is evident and encouraged throughout scripture.
Spiritual surrender is an act of faith, keeping hope alive by choosing defeat over death. It is the first act for those coming to salvation, and a continual habit of those walking with Christ. To spiritually surrender means to let go of control and trust God.
To surrender to Christ is a decisive blow to our flesh. “I have been crucified with Christ, and it is no longer I that live…” (Galatians 2:20). But that’s not the end of the verse.
When you surrender to Christ you receive new hope and new life: “…but Christ living in me. That life which I now live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself up for me.”
Yes, you must give up or surrender your old self, but when you do, sin’s power over you is broken. “knowing this, that our old man was crucified with him, that the body of sin might be done away with, so that we would no longer be in bondage to sin” (Romans 6:6).
When you surrender to Christ, you aren’t surrendering your God-given identity and uniqueness. You aren’t giving up as a defeated hero, but as a refugee from this world, escaping a life of slavery, starvation, and abuse.
We surrender not for fear or threat, but in hope that the One to whom we surrender has a better life for us. And that hope doesn’t disappoint.
A Biblical Example Of Surrender
His surrender is met with rewards beyond his expectations. He is received with open arms, lavish love, and a new life as a restored son.
Jesus lived a life of continual surrender to the Father. As he said, “Most certainly, I tell you, the Son can do nothing of himself, but what he sees the Father doing. For whatever things he does, these the Son also does likewise” (John 5:19).
And as He said to the Father when the time came to surrender his life, “not my will, but yours, be done” (Luke 22:42).
Walking with Christ means continual surrender, trusting that the God who made your children has a plan for them and loves them more than you. and giving up control.
Trusting God In Times Of Uncertainty
Right now the world is a bit topsy turvy and things may feel out of control. Maybe you don’t what to trust or who to trust. If it feels overwhelming, please know you are not alone and your feelings are normal.
But as people of faith, we are blessed with some certainties.
- God is in control and He cares about you.
- One day Jesus will return and bring healing and justice.
- God will never leave you or change His mind about loving you.
Surrendering To God In Parenting
Parenting in a way that honors Christ requires a great deal of surrender. For moms, it starts with surrendering to the discomforts and changes of pregnancy. Later it means giving up your sleep, your schedule, and having your way.
To surrender also means giving up our parenting fears, which assume the worst and make us over-protective. Our fearfulness stifles growth and produces fear and frustration in a child.
We are to protect our children, not to serve our own anxieties, but to serve a God who will hold us accountable for the care we give
We don’t own our children, we are their stewards for God. In the parable of the talents, Jesus warns us about letting fear drive our stewardship (Matthew 25:24-27). Proper care requires taking reasonable risks. If we are overprotective, we stand in the way of our children maturing as God intends them to.
How To Surrender To God And Let Go
If you feel yourself fighting for control or feel overwhelmed by fear and anxiety, it’s a sign you need to let go. Repent and turn away from doing things your way and lean on God.
Romans 2:4 says God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance. So trust that you will receive relief and rest when you surrender. His goodness will motivate you to let go. Read and meditate on verses that remind you of these truths. Here are a few.
“And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you” Psalm 9:10.
“For whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him” Hebrews 11:6
“Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you” I Peter 5:7
Surrender To God in Prayer
To practice proper Christian surrender requires turning in your fears and anxieties for prayer (Philippians 4:6). You are surrendering to Him so talk to Him. You are coming to God for healing and hope, so ask.
I recently told God I wanted to give up “being quick to anger” – being snippy with my kids.
I had been looking at the verse almost daily “be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” James 1:19. Get this verse as a free downloadable phone wallpaper. I do believe it helps to read this scripture often.
And then I prayed. That’s it. I just said it. I prayed it. And somehow without any great effort, no plan, no striving – I stopped being snippy – at least for a while. I give God full credit.
Final Thoughts on What it Means to Surrender to God
Sometimes, especially when it comes to struggling in the flesh, surrender is more effective than our striving. It’s ironic to struggle with surrender, isn’t it? Surrender is about ending thriving and fighting.
Will I be snippety again someday? I expect so. I’m still here with my flesh. But then I’ll surrender again.
Excerpts from Parenting in Christ: Training in the Disciplines of Jesus
What one thing would be the most difficult thing for you to give up for the rest of your life? In what ways do you need to surrender more to God as a parent?
Find this helpful? You may also enjoy:
How To Teach Your Kids Biblical Integrity
Biblical Stewardship
Melissa Henderson
May 1, 2018Special message. Surrendering our children to Christ is vital for parenting. There have been times when I have forgotten to give my worries to God and when I remembered to hand Him my concerns, a peace came over me.
Christina Dronen
May 2, 2018I think sometimes when we are in a position of authority it can be easier to forget that we are also still under authority. 🙂
Bob Bauge
August 31, 2021We say the Lords Prayer so often without meaning it, the words become meaninglessness. How many of us actually mean,
“Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven?”
Do we practice turning our will over to God.
My life is so much happier when I do.
Christina Dronen
September 2, 2021Great observation & prayer- truly I am finding more & more than surrender brings me peace. Believing I’m in control isn’t really true or helpful.
Thanks for sharing, Bob. 🙂
Tony
May 2, 2018Love the opening of this post Christina
Well said, I particularly liked “It means accepting that the battle has been won not on your terms”
So often we try and soften our defeat to find a middle road.
Love the cover of your book and congratulations on finishing it.
Christina Dronen
May 2, 2018Thanks!
Yeah I think we live in a cultural moment where people like to think God should conform to their opinions rather than the other way around.
Boma
May 2, 2018Thanks for this reminder, Christina. It helps, when we remember that the One we are surrendering to is faithful and trustworthy. Blessings to you.
Christina Dronen
May 2, 2018Absolutely!
Blessings to you. 🙂
Jeanne Takenaka
May 2, 2018Christina, great post. God has shown me where my fears in parenting lie. Parenting our boys has been the most humbling, most challenging, most difficult thing I’ve ever done. But I wouldn’t change a thing. And yes, I’ve had to surrender some of what I wanted for our boys for what God knows is best for them. I’ve had to surrender my own fears from childhood and trust that God will walk them through the struggles every child deals with.
Annie
May 2, 2018This has been the toughest part of parenting for me – surrendering my plans, my order, my control. I’m learning to steward and guide rather than control. I still have a list in the back of my mind of ways life would be easier if everyone did everything my way – and I’m learning to open those expectations up to God, too. Thanks for this wise encouragement!
Emily | To Unearth
May 3, 2018I don’t have kids, but I can relate to the need for surrender for so many other areas of my life! My biggest fear with surrender is that God will take away what I’m surrendering as a test. But I know that’s not how God works, so I need to pray for that truth to set me free from fear!
Edna Davidsen
May 3, 2018Hi Christina!
Yes, surrender is an act of faith. Being a parent myself makes it easy for me to relate to this post. You nailed it when you said:
“We don’t own our children, we are their stewards for God. ”
That is a wonderful perspective.
God bless!
Edna Davidsen
Sarah
September 23, 2021I asked God to help me with surrendering and to be a better parent and was led to this site. Thank you. Praise Jesus!
Christina Dronen
September 25, 2021Hi Sarah – that’s wonderful! I am so happy to hear that these words blessed you and answered your prayers 🙂
Blessings as you continue to pursue surrender and parenting in Christ 🙂
Mark
September 26, 2021Thanks, Christina! I was looking for Biblical occurrences of “surrender” and here they are. I was wanting to know about surrender in discipleship, and here you talk so grace-fully about it. Pax Christi!
Christina Dronen
February 24, 2022Thanks for the encouragement Mark – glad to hear it’s helpful!
Heather
February 9, 2022I came upon your article while trying to lean how to fully surrender to God. I am going to through emotional/spiritual war right now and it is bad. I am not in a good place. I know I held back because if I let go, I don’t feel God will help me and may hurt me along the way. I know that is not Gods character (i am in counseling, and seeing a Christian Counselor because of abuse from my father as a child) I am to the point I don’t care and just want God to take control. I read about with kids and you nailed it with me. My kids are my world and I recently realized that I need to back up. I don’t mean to be the way I am in their lives and just want God to handle it all. I am really struggling and need help in these areas how to fully trust God. I really want to let go fully.
Christina Dronen
February 24, 2022Surrender is a process and something we have to do over & over. No one is perfect at it (except Jesus!) Sounds like you need lots of grace for yourself and its so good you are getting counseling. Our earthly fathers can mess up our perspective on our Heavenly Father. Praying you find peace.
doug
March 6, 2022Sometimes, especially when it comes to struggling in the flesh, surrender is more effective than our striving. It’s ironic to struggle with surrender, isn’t it? Surrender is about ending thriving and fighting……. should be Surrender is about ending striving and fighting.
Christina Dronen
March 8, 2022Definitely surrender can be so much more powerful. I agree – its ironic and feels counterintuitive. True- as Hebrews 4 says we are to strive to enter into his rest 🙂
patricia Vos
March 28, 2022Powerful I need to surrender to Jesus will not mine everyday thank u Powerful teaching be blessed and help us Lord be more like U Holy
Samantha
August 24, 2022You’re telling me that to surrender to God , the first thing I need to do is just say it ? And God will work out the rest ? Is it that simple ?
Christina Dronen
September 14, 2022Hi Samantha, I do think it’s the first step, but it’s not as much about your words as your heart and willingness to surrender… about your conviction that it’s worth trusting God and risking letting go of control. I think that your reading this article and I assume searching for this information means you desire to do it and I think God loves to help us when we want to do the right thing 🙂
I hope that’s helpful.
Lee Smith
August 27, 2022I struggle with believing I have blasphemed against God or have pushed him away because my health and finances are declining and I live in fear of every thing I have no peace or enjoyment, I can’t hardly pray or read anymore . I feel like there’s no hope for me I don’t understand what God wants from me.
Christina Dronen
September 14, 2022Sounds like you are going through a really difficult time. Fortunately, God isn’t fragile. Many throughout history and scripture have expressed feelings of anger, disappointment, etc toward God. I believe God would rather hear your authentic heart than forced, insincere praise. I don’t believe we are promised to be spared from struggle in this life, quite the opposite, but we are told that God will be near us and help us to endure. That gives me some comfort in difficult times anyway – knowing I’m not alone and my feelings aren’t uncared for. Keep seeking his presence, especially through difficulties.
Nichole Brinson
September 7, 2022Thank you so much for this. I am struggling with surrendering my will, my, husband, and my kids. I keep saying I don’t know how, but this has helped me immensely.
Christina Dronen
September 14, 2022So glad to hear this was helpful to you. It’s a challenging thing to surrender and I think takes consistent work 🙂 Blessings!
Angel Fyreheart
February 7, 2023I am feeling like it’s about that time to talk to Jesus and surrender. Just looking for how
Blessings.